ARTIFICIALLY ENHANCED INSOMNIA
I had a cup of coffee and so its 3:16am and I am up. This happens about twice a year: I forget what time it is and have coffee too late in the day.
so while life is too exciting to be posting...There is always time at 3am for something else.
How about something trite?
Someone triggered this memory earlier today:
When I was a kid, there was this guy who used to fix our appliances, mostly our washer and drier. These bulky items were left by the previous owner (an elderly Jewish crank who moved into a retirement community and generously left her goodies for my folks). The washer and drier had multiple symptoms until their eventual, but yet unfortunate, demise: the drier would frequently eat socks, catch fire, lose pieces of siding. The washer was another more frightening hazard. Having the unlucky predicament of losing one if its short disk-like legs, it would unhappily teeter during the spin cycle--inching its way across our basement floor--using up its foot or two of cord, and eventually pulling itself out of the socket.
There was a legitimate reason why we kids were exempt from doing laundry. (as a note: I think my parents figured that we could finally wash our clothes ourselves after reaching 5 feet tall, or so. ...And now that I contemplate this theory further, it makes sense why they measured our hight on a closet wall, marked in pencil. The day we reached the desired height, we could partake in the rollercoaster-superfun-ness of the badass home appliances around the house)
Anyway, getting back to the guy who prolonged the lives of our stuff. Tony is this amazing guy. He stands a towering 6"6 and weighs about 250 pounds and never bathes. He has long big dreads and drives a vehicle whose make or model would be hard to recollect if a cop wanted info, but unmistakable, covered in boards, and anarchist slogans and drawings that Tony did himself. The other mysterious thing about him is his popularity with the female types--he always had the flavor of the month following behind--laughing at his jokes, handing him tools.
As a kid you think every neighborhood has such a fella. You don't realize until you are a lot older that having eccentric personalities around of this sort is not the norm. Everyone I knew employed Tony because his rates were amazing--usually not much more than parts. As a child I thought all fix-it men were Caucasian/anti-establishment/giants who came to save the day.
And for all my friends whom for this entry has been posted at a legitimate hour, it is due to you that I remain with integrity!
gnight folks
3 Comments:
Just so that you know that you are not the only one who's awake!! :P
3:52 AM
We had one of those guys... cut off jeans and a mullet. All the Jews hired him and I could swear he was ripping everybody off. He'd turn up at random hours saying that he had just mowed your lawn two weeks ago and he needs ten bucks.
He was Dan-the-man and he actually shared an apartment with another charachter of note, Jalopeno-Joe
5:42 PM
okay, nemo- did you read someone else's post? cuz clearly tony was NOT one of those guys- and that's the point!
btw- i think that tony may have morphed into shlomo aronovitz...
9:23 PM
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home